The Perfect Job

Now and again I think "If I had to go out and get a job right now, what would I do????" and I am always hard pressed to find even one answer. Without a college degree and with several years out of the loop in the business realm, I realize I am hardly a hot commodity! Although a few are unconventional, I have narrowed the possibilities down to three or four "realistic" possibilities. Who knows, maybe I could win awards and high acclaim for my achievements in.....

Career Option #1: Pacifier Retrieval Specialist

This job requires stealth like agility at it's core, due to the need of precise, quiet searching in dark, cramped corners--usually underneath cribs anywhere from midnight to 5 or 6am. It's not a job that features one's best side, but some one's gotta do it and I don't mean to boast, but I'm pretty darn good at it (even with my handicap, which is partial blindness sans contact lenses, when I am called upon to carry out this task).

Career Option #2 : Grocery Store Bagger Extraordinaire!

Perhaps it's the "Leaman" in me (a branch of my extendeded family who tends towards the extremes of competitiveness), but since having children (and desiring to get out of the grocery store a.s.a.p.) I have to say that I have developed quite a skill for efficient bagging. Not only do I considerately group my groceries on the revolving black strip in catagories of "cold", "meat" and "fruit", etc. but I also volunteer to bag them as well. Seeing as though we do not have a garage (and even if we did), I would rather have less bags than more...and so I take advantage of all the space in any given plastic or paper container. As if there was some unspoken competition to whom can checkout the quickest, I tear through those groceries once they have passed through the scanner. In fact, I pride myself with the knowledge that if I were a checkout person, those who found themselves lucky enough to be in my aisle would be amazed at the speed, organization and-as a bonus-humor that awaited them at my deft & able hands.

You are probably feeling bad for me at this point. I might too..but the world needs friendly and efficient checkout clerks and baggers, and I think I could be one! (and I'd secretly pay for the stray bananas that desperate mothers let their discontented children munch on while getting the deed of shopping done. I just could not charge them).

Career Option #3: Toy Picker Upper

Man! Am I good at this!!! Again, I do not mean to toot my own horn, but I can have a room picked up at the speed of light! Now, don't expect perfection inside cupboard doors and drawers, but externally things will look put together (this can be true for my external and internal self as well, unforunately!!). Three times a day I tidy up the livng room where we spend most of our time. We do not have an over abundance of toys, but what we do have gets picked up whenever the children are resting or sleeping...it simply gives me the illusion that things are 'under control'. I am sure some people would wonder why I pick it up just to have it messed up again, but it's just the way I function best.

******

Seriously though...I do sometimes wish I had a degree under my belt. Maybe someday I will. But not right now, and that is truly fine by me. Right now, the best and biggest thing I can do is dish out love (the tough and tender kinds)to my children. And then perhaps someday I'll sit in as a local TV Talk Show or run a small business or be mayor of our small town or direct children's drama or write a novel...who knows! With God all things are truly possible. I believe this.

Take a look at the lovin' taking place below (and no, it was not posed or suggested. it happened all on it's own)...

Yuperee...I have the best job in the world. And maybe, just maybe, I am inspiration to the checkout clerks and baggers who are "lucky" enough to have me as their actively participating patron. Watch and learn, my friends, watch and learn.

:)