Signs of Aging

I am not old.

I am not that old.

In comparison to many at the nursing home up the road, I at the very cusp of adulthood (that might be a stretch, but I wanted to use the word "cusp", so bear with me).

There is, however, no shade of doubt that I am getting older.

Please do not perceive this as complaining. Whenever people bemoan the advancing number of years they are, my grandmother is always quick to clip "It sure beats the alternative". She should know. My grandfather passed away suddenly at the age of sixty-three. I am a little over half his age when he passed, and at this vantage point I see how very young he was. Age is a gift of which we should not lament over. While I am not going to wax eloquently on the passing of time, there have been trail of small events occurring lately that have reminded me that I am no longer twenty-one (the age i think I will  always be in my head). 


One such tell-tale sign that time is not standing still occurred this week in the check out line at one of my favorite stores, Marshalls.  Among the other few items I had to place on the check-out counter was a casual long-sleeved, charcoal gray shirt found for $7.99 in the Juniors section. I thought it would look cute paired with one of my three yoga pants that rotate their wearing time on my frame over six of the seven days of the week. It had a collegiate "Varsity" emblem of sorts on the front and that did give me pause, but the $7.99 price tag and flattering cut kept me from hanging it back on the rack.

When at the checkout line, I deliberated over it in my mind as I held it up. The perky cashier, no more than a shade past eighteen, took notice. 

"That's so cute. You're not sure?" she asks with a tilt of her small head.

"Oh, I like it. But...I'm thinking that maybe it's just not age appropriate for me."

Cashier takes a closer look at the shirt, casts another glance at me and says:

"Oooohh, the Varsity-thingy on the front? Yea, it might be a little young for you".
Her ponytail bounces as she speaks. My self-esteem deflates as I listen.

It was good for her that cashiers do not work on commission. Or collect tips.

The cute v-neck went back on the rack. I went home to bury my head in the Blair Fashions catalog where, very apparently, it belongs. I'm seeing a future brimming full of sweater sets in my very near future.

In another age revealing episode, I completely blanked mid-sentence during an after-(childrensbedtime)hours meeting with a friend at a cozy downtown restaurant earlier this week. Instead of immediately informing her that the train which was carrying my thought had abruptly left the track, my mouth kept going, hoping that the train would miraculously reappear. Reappear it did not and I sounded like our President without a teleprompter (no offense, Mr. President). It was terribly awkward for me, as it was only 8:30 and already the old cerebrum was closing up shop for the night. I used to not only be able to converse, but was most often at my social prime well past sunset. Not anymore. Now you'll catch me at my personal best between 12:00-12:15pm. Unfortunately, I'm using dishing out five servings of cold mac-n-cheese to be microwaved over that small sliver of time. Gratefully, the friend I met with is tremendously talented at being charming and soothed over the "off-the-track" moment graciously. Bless her heart. 

 

By the way, this girlfriend (read her well-written thoughts HERE) and I met for the sole purpose of discussing the first steps to fulfilling a common dream. There are a million and one reasons why I would have never instigated such an evening, and that is why I am even more grateful that God caused our paths to cross. She not only instigated it, but I sense in her an honest opinion and persistent cheerleader. I only hope I can be the same to her. If you find someone who shares a similar desire to do something or other, I would suggest doing something about it. It does a spirit good!

***
 The most frequent indicator that I am not growing any younger, is that I will dash up the stairs with great purpose to retrieve Something Very Important, all to find myself two seconds later standing in the middle of the hallway wondering "What in the world did I come up here for?". I have been known to stand there for up to five minutes, aghast at my sudden and severe memory loss, coming up empty as to what demand brought me there. (Meanwhile, a little diaper-less two year old is laying there, watching the clock tick as he waits for his mama to bring down more diapers from the upper levels...)
 

Signs of aging do not just happen around the eyes. They also creep up in conversations and at cashier counters. They reveal themselves suddenly in front of closets in the middle of hallways. It is important to keep in mind, however, that along with the wrinkles, the memory loss and the social faux pas, there is wisdom to be gained that is only available as one walks farther away from the fountain of youth. Wisdom, infused with Love, is a beauty regiment for the heart that can make becoming older a most beautiful process, no matter at what point you are in the journey. As with everything, it is a choice to embrace wisdom and be embraced by Love.

Wisdom and love...

These are the signs of aging that I desire and will celebrate!

The other not-so-flattering signs, I will laugh-and occasionally cringe- about those. 

What about YoU? 

What "signs of aging" have you celebrating 

or laughing (or maybe cringing) over?
Do tell!