On Worry and the Quirkiest of Quirks





Good Morning, my friend...


God answered prayer this morning. It was not accompanied with trumpets or fanfare. It was not a dramatic revelation. It was in the quiet comment of a friend who said they are feeling better and clearer than they have for a long time. I was humbled by that because I have such a minuscule amount of faith. It is shameful, especially as I can look back over my small life and see that I (and others) have been provided for time after time after time.


Yet, I'm just like my little son who breaks into a sweat (and tears) when he perceives its mealtime and he does not see his mama laboring over frozen mixed vegetables and worries when the miniature marshmallow dessert is not served immediately upon the devouring of the latter. Exasperated, I wonder "since when have I not fed him? He acts as though I have forgotten to feed him for the hundreds of meals he already consumed in his mere 17 months on planet Earth!"


I cannot blame him, because I act just like him. Except worse. My first instinct is to worry, worry, worry..and then pray. For all the Bible school, institute and studying that my history abounds with, one might think that somewhere along the way I would have memorized "Cast your cares upon the Lord" and "Pray without ceasing". Actually, I did. Those verses easily came to mind while typing. It goes to prove that memorization, for memorization's sake is not enough. It needs to become a part of one's lifestyle, of one's every thought, every breath. I suppose that is a process which takes a lifetime. No wonder they didn't make charts for stickers of accomplishment like that in Sunday School! I'd still be waiting to paste mine on there!


Ahh....(I'm taking a sip of coffee here)...so much to absorb, and so awesome a King & Kingdom to absorb from. I want to change, to be transformed, to learn how to talk with God without the least bit of self-consciousness.


On a considerably more shallow note:


I have this incredibly STRANGE quirk. I've known for some time that I've had it, as my sisters have told me in the past that I do it. But as we were watching "License to Wed" this weekend (I got to pick out the movie selection or else it might have been "Saving Private Ryan". Again.) my perfectly dear husband emoted for about 5 minutes about my odd habit. It must have been heavy on his chest, because once I opened the door, he came barreling through. I will disclose this to you here, which is probably very stupid, because you will watch for me to do this next time we are together:


I mouth the words of others while they are speaking! AND I HAVE NO CONTROL OVER IT, as I have absolutely NO IDEA I'm doing it!!!!! I brought it up indirectly when I caught myself nudging Mandy Moore's character by nodding for her when her boyfriend sweetly proposed to her. I was so "in the moment" that I felt eyes wide open with expectation and my head bobbing to and fro. As soon as I snapped out of it, I made a comment that I had 'caught myself' in the act. That was all it took for Curt to launch into a commentary and demonstration of my subconscious desire to speak for everyone in the world, or at least the world that surrounds me at any given moment. I'm surprised he (or any of my friends!) has not yet committed me to Wernserville ( a well-known local mental penitentiary).


So, if someday you find yourself face to face with me in conversation, and I appear to begin speaking in silent tongues, PLEASE wink, nudge or outright tell me that I look like a nut case.


Thank you very much.


It's now time to hang up my "pen" for the day. For those of you (mom and Ashley) who read my blog, thank you. I certainly appreciate every soul who drops by this imaginary cottage of mine for a visit. If you have an extra minute to leave feedback, maybe a way I could pray for you, or just share about YOU, I would relish it.


Happy Monday....

Comments

Anonymous said…
Dear Jeanne,
I just love reading your blog and "hope" some day you will publish them for the whole world to read. For now you make my day.
Love,
Andi
Anonymous said…
Jeane, I am so glad you had a good trip to the state of "Big Hair". I loved Texas when me and Jamie visisted there 17 some odd years ago. You should have seen me with my little, white, pointy toed, ankle high, cowgirl boots and my bluejeans, so tight it was shameful. Let me not leave out my western style belt that I wore and of course my huge, geled, moused hair so stiff a tornado couldn't budge it, ahh those were the days....Anyway glad you are home safe. I do have some prayer requests, my heart has been heavy, I laid awake alot of the night last night worrying when I should have been praying, which I finally did. Anyway, Devan is going through the teenage years and is trying to figure out where she fits in this big ole world. Also I have a friend whose son was 19 and he took his life about a month ago. No one would have ever guessed this would have happened to this God loving, fearing family. He was saved, so that is giving her peace, but the act happened in front of her. I can't image what she must be going through. Thank you, Love you, Deva
Hello my friend! I read your blog and laugh outloud!! If someone would see me laughing at my computer screen, they too would wonder about my state of mind. LOOKING FORWARD TO FRIDAY!!!!! If anything comes up, please call, otherwise I will anticipate your arrival at my back door!!! XOXO
just bring some $ so you can go shopping while I keep your children!!!
XOXO
What a GREAT afternoon I had with you. I think it's probably good that we don't live closer or we would get nothing done but laughing at one another's quirks and shopping at Lulu and Tutz. Love you so much,
Janelle
Anonymous said…
Jeanne.....when there are extra minutes in my computer time.....it is with great anticipation that I "check" to see if there may be a new entry.....never yet have been disappointed when there is!!! Love your musings...funny and serious!!!!!A faithful reader, Karen
akbermudez said…
Jeanne,

I have been absent from your blog for a week or two, so I was catching up a bit. But I never noticed you mouthing words before. I think I would have remembered it if it was something noteworthy. So I wouldn't worry about that. Your husband probably notices your quirkiness (like mine does) only because we are together. Most people never notice. So dont' worry about that!

Your friend,

Kari

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