Old-School Beauty

Grace Kelly.

Jackie O.

Audrey Hepburn.

Princess Diana.

These are all women I have, at some point in my past, devoured magazines, autobiographies and movies (if applicable) of. I still have a great fascination of these fashion icons who left those millions in their wake wanting more because not everything was poured out for all to see. In classic womanly beauty there is room for mystery, a platform for intelligence and an aura of confidence. It is a beauty that we now know so little of, and because we have so pitifully few reminders of what it looks like, we are apt to accept what our culture has pared down and cheapened as a weak substitute.

Take yours truly, for example:

Lately, while I am profoundly grateful for the gift of my role as "mother", I've been feeling like I want to break free from FEELING like that is all I am. This loving, yelling, child-rearing German Workhorse who wears worn out yoga pants and boring beige bras (ok, so I have a few good ones too that I break out on occasion, like when I really want a curtain rod hung or something) is yearning for more. The social affairs that require one  to don a pair of stilettos and sparkly bling are far and few between. Way far. Way few.

That is why I wasted no time in slipping an "accepts with pleasure" rsvp card in the mail for the invitation to a childhood friend's wedding at the Naval Academy and subsequent reception at the Officer's Club (don't mind me!). I cannot wait. Who cares that my husband could barely pick out my friend's beautiful face in a crowd! Who cares that the two hour drive there will interfere with his Saturday putzing? This is my chance to FEEL LIKE A WOMAN in a very formal way!!! Oh, yes...and of course to support my very dear childhood friend. (I love you, Jess! Thanks for inviting your shallow friend!).

Last night, I tried on several dresses my generous (pregnant) sister lent me for such an occasion. I was banking on the one-shoulder J.Crew black, silky number. I was willing to suck it up (literally) and be short of breath all evening, if need be. I think breathy voices have a certain appeal anyway. My sister has the most adorable petite frame, is a bit shorter than I and although I can fit into her size (after posing in various unnatural contortions), our proportions are different. Which is to say, while she looks like Audrey Hepburn in that dress, apparently, I took more of a J.Lo form in it. And my husband liked it. Quite a bit. In fact, he requested that I wear it every night when he gets home from work (yes, of course dear. I'll throw on my pearls too...). However, he requested that I not wear it in public. Instead of scoffing, I was appreciative of his respect for me. I sadly hung up the dress I had (literally) poured myself into back up in my closet. I loved it's style, but on me, it sent the wrong message. Had he not said anything, I might have blindly strayed from my Hepburn-adhering standards and dipped into Kardashian territory. Shwew. That was close.

Beauty and sexiness, in today's terms, are the same thing. They are incredibly easy to find, cheap to buy and could easily earn you a second look. It amazes me, really, that for all that feminism fights for, the desecration of classic feminine beauty reverses. We allow ourselves and our daughters to be fooled into thinking more leg, more breast and more hip exposure will get us ahead...and in many industries, this is still true! In High School and college hallways, it's more about the breast than the brain. How anti-feminist is that?

Thus, in the spirit of the Ice Princess, the Oleg Cassini-devotee, the one who had Breakfast at Tiffany's and the People's Princess, my Jones New York standby..the classic "little black dress" that while flattering, leaves plenty of room for the imagination... is laid out for the anticipated evening soiree. Choosing a modest approach, however, does not require one to forsake glamor! Oh no, my friend...I will not be a pious fashion martyr!

Give me some bling-a-ding-ding! 

(gold and rhinestone! I'm talking big pageant earrings and a chunky bracelet, baby!)

Give me some L'Oreal Sublime Bronzing lotion!

(love it! Farrah Fawcett glow, here I come)

Give me some strappy heels to slip my shiny red painted toes into!

(gold or black, still undecided)

Most of all, give me a night with the man whose admiring look means the most

and whose respect I have!

(in which I do not take for granted)

I am fairly certain, I will feel like a woman who is first, 

a woman,

than a lover,

than a mother.

And yet...all three are beautifully intertwined,

giving true beauty that comes

from a very

very

grateful heart.

 

For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone.
-- Audrey Hepburn