Forget "Easy". Try "Manageable".

I think I have figured out what it is.

 "It" being the near-constant sense of dashed

expectation that this should be easier.

"This" being motherhood.

It seems as though there should be one clever book 

or a miracle method 

or special nanny trade secrets

or SOME thing that clues me into

the way to make juggling five little lives easier.

It is never a pleasant trip down the rocky road of dashed expectations, especially when the expectations involve the words "smooth" and "easy". Because I am not the quickest learner in all of creation, the obvious took me by surprise when it slammed into my stream of thinking.

 

Life is HARD WORK. Mother or other, it is always an elusive dream to 

expect otherwise. Unless, of course, you're George Clooney or his girlfriend-of-the-month. But let's save that bunny trail for another post as I'd like to stay on-point.

While motherhood can not be easy, I am finding ways to make it more manageable.

Humbly and oh-so-hesitantly, I will share three meager-and-still-under-testing

ways that I am finding shreds of sanity this summer:

Tighten the Schedule!

We had a loose schedule. I was still pulling large clumps of my hair out at night, dreading the next day. That is when my husband suggested a schedule. I told him in what one might describe as a terse tone, that we "already have one thank you very much now go back to watching your Western.". The next morning, as I was fantasizing about picking off my toenails with pliers (as an preferred alternative to the swirling vortex I found myself in the middle of), I decided to take the advice from the father of my children to heart.

Yes, I already had a schedule, but it needed to be tightened. Significantly.

Thus, here hangs the layout of our day, in which the troops have been made aware of time and again. The yellow post-it notes are chores, one note per child, three chores listed on each. They receive a small treat upon returning the chore slips to me.

You will note that "TV Time" is at 3:00. Before this schedule was posted, TV Time was most every time. While I am all for doing what needs to be done to survive, the sheer amount of TV they were watching was not fine by me. Now, the time in front of the screen is earned, and by the time it arrives, they are so eager to watch it, they actually sit down and do! I arranged for it to be over the pre-dinner hours, ones that I usually dub "The Full-Moon Period of Every Day".  There is a chalk board in our laundry room with the three eldest's names on it. If during the day they accumulate 5 check marks for bad behavior (fighting, showing disrespect, hitting, pooping in the flower beds, etc.) , they go to their rooms in silence while their siblings watch as Martha Speaks.

As with any disciplinary activity, there is always opportunity for grace and mercy to be shown, as God extends the same to us. While consequences are important to experience (and mine do!), children are quick to embrace the gift of grace and mercy, when it is not deserved.

Airing out (not dirty) laundry!

Domestically speaking, there is no such thing as "Laundry Day" at our home. If it were so, it would begin at sun up and end at sun down, with our members only wearing undergarments, as there would be nothing left in our drawers after a weeks worth of throwing worn stuff in the hamper. Thus, laundry day is every day. Doing a load first thing in the morning and then HANGING IT OUT TO DRY has been helpful. Hanging it out more time consuming than sticking it in the dryer, yes. Having it smell so delightful, stay wrinkle free until I fetch it,  having the articles of clothing already turned inside out and folding it upon taking it off the line are all benefits to doing laundry this way. Not to mention reducing dryer usage, which does make a dent in the electric bill.

Wake Up Earlier Than The Others!

I do not have much to say here other than I know for certain this makes a difference, but I have yet to get my body to cooperate consistently. Because my walking partner just gave birth to the most precious little bundle, I have no one waiting for me down the street in the wee hours of the morning and my bed is always begging me to stay. There has never been a day when waking up and getting myself ready for the task ahead--physically and mentally- has not been a good thing. This my friend, is something I am working on. If you have any suggestions of how YOU got into the true practice of it, please give me your advice!

***

Moment by moment I continue to try and put to rest my expectations of "easy" to rest (which, considering I live in the midst of hundreds of women who raise 10+ children in no air conditioning, no electricity and in long black sleeved dressed, is laughable...i have it SO easy!). I instead try and look for ways to make it manageable. As you have read, I have no gold mine of suggestions for every occasion, but rather just a few that have surfaced and seem to be reaping sanity-saving rewards.I've got high hopes (and low expectations!) that they will continue to do so.

Thank you for stopping by the cottage!